Friday, August 14, 2009

Fedex Bureaucratic Nonsense

This is a woefully sad tale.

The Man from Fedex comes to deliver my package. He requires a signature.

Man from Fedex: How old are you?
Me: 20
Man from Fedex: Then you can't sign for this.
Me: (affronted) It's my package!
Man from Fedex: It's my job.
Me: But that's my name, right there!
Man from Fedex: Yeah, but you've got to be 21 or older to sign for it. Can you get the super to sign for you?
Me: ?! (looks around for super's number, can't find it)
Man from Fedex: I'll come back tomorrow.
Me: I can't sign for it tomorrow; it's my Sabbath.
Man from Fedex: So on Tuesday.
Me: (thinking- what good does that do me? no one over 21 will be here on Tuesday) How about if I call the person who sent me the package and they tell you they give me permission to accept the package?
Man from Fedex: Nope. See you Tuesday. I'll try to find the super but otherwise, Tuesday it is.
Me: (thinks- OMG.)

I cannot wait to be 21.

16 comments:

dman said...

Perhaps you should contact Federal Express today. If you can find someone high enough, fast enough, perhaps they will order the driver to return with the package. Alternatively, they will make sure you will receive your package next time.
http://www.fedex.com/us/customersupport/express/callorwrite.html

Gavi said...

FedEx can be annoying... Call and yell at them - they should be able to get it re-delivered today.

The worst case of egregious FedEx error that I had was when I once sent a parcel to friends in yerushalayim who live at 47 Herl Boulevard, Apt. 3. FexEx tried to deliver it to 3 Kerzl Bouland apt. 47 in Jerusaber (of course, no such address exists)! After quite a few phone calls I managed to get them to correct it...

EJB said...

Sounds a bit like the Burns security bureaucracy at Wilf. Unwavering compliance with their rules. Lack of common sense.

Anonymous said...

The lesson learned is to never use Fedex Adult Signature. Use Direct or Indirect Adult Signature instead. Or use UPS instead.

The Shipper said...

The previous comment was mine.

Fedex Adult Signature is intended for delivery of wine, which must be signed for by an adult.

And no, Fedex is not flexible with this. Another blogger recently had a similar experience.

Jersey said...

Wow, most people want to turn 21 for OTHER reasons.

Anonymous said...

Makes me wonder what kind of contraband you are getting delivered for an after-school assignment.

Chana said...

Gavi- what an awful experience that sounds like...

EJB- that's super amusing. Personal experience, I assume?

Anon- Haha! I'm definitely the one for contraband. ;)

dman said...

EJB:

Any tips you would like to share about dealing with the Burns security bureaucracy at Wilf?

EJB said...

Chana:
ID!!! ID!!! I was kicked out of YU buildings MANY TIMES (Muss Lounge, Library) because I didn't have my ID card on me. They only thing the guards know how to do (the only word they know in English too). I guess I didn't look like a Yeshiva student.

dman:
The #1 tip in dealing with burns security is don't listen to what they tell you. I've learned that they are so scared for their job they will NOT touch you (out of fear of getting fired/sued). If you run away they might initially chase you, but will eventually give up.

dman said...

EJB:

I'm going to be on campus next Friday and the Sunday after, bringing my son to Wilf. Obviously, I'm not going to have an ID card (and neither will he in the beginning). Am I going to have a problem?

EJB said...

Ooh an honors parent! They are required to be especially nice during orientation. Therefore, I predict they will not give you any problems out of fear of losing their job. If they do, just ask to speak to their supervisor. That always scares the bejeebers out of them.

dman said...

EJB:

I am, but I did not mention that in my post. How did you know?

EJB said...

Why else would you be moving in Friday?

dman said...

HE'S moving in somewhere in Wilf. I'm still not sure where I'm going to be from Friday afternoon to Sunday morning.

EJB said...

Oh. Well I didn't know any other reason you'd be on campus Friday before the official orientation.