Thursday, January 28, 2010

Evacuate The Dance Floor: The Party Don't Start Till I Walk In

Today is an example of total pwnage.

It began with a visit to my incredibly gorgeous (she looks like a supermodel) doctor. She stabbed me up a bit (huzzah for shots and blood samples and the rest of it) but the part that took the cake was the examination. You see, I'm incredibly ticklish. Like, incredibly ticklish. So I laughed my way through the entire exam and my darling doctor seemed perplexed. It was fabulosity incarnate. My beauteous doctor has ordered me to take a dance class and take a woman's multivitamin (apparently all women should be on one.) Does anyone know of any good dance classes in the New York area? Preferably ones that utilize lots of current pop music and fun moves. (I'd do salsa or tango, except that requires dancing with men, and my father isn't so thrilled by that.)

But it gets better! Because now (with an MMR vaccine stabbed into my left shoulder and a bandaid on my inner elbow crease) I decide to stop by Stern to see lovely people such as the Sorceress and Abergakames. Abergakames appears with a bowl of grapes whereas the Sorceress decides to buy a baked good. I eat my knish and strawberry yogurt (too much sugar, alas) and am on my Dramatics! Dramatics is a hair-cuttery salon. Today the welcoming guy was gay, with an absurd mop of curls tied up in a ponytail at the top of his forehead in gold and brown, and a suitjacket that plunged excessively low, so that I kept on staring at his 'Envy' tattoo, which was inked somewhere on the left side of his chest. But a different lady did my hair and she had lots of fun with it. She was telling me all about how she is uberly creative and she loves art with hair. Hurrah for art with hair!

Haircuts aren't complete without getting one's nails done. Having taken a three-month-hiatus from manicures, I decided it was time to resume. Now my nails are all prettified and glittered in golden crimson.

Hair, manicure...all that's left is a makeover! Which is precisely why I went to Sephora and met a darling lady named Ebonie who taught me all about how to apply makeup correctly which means I currently look like a goddess. So I bought all the products and spent over $100 in makeup purchases, which makes me happy.

I dance-partied on the subway train back uptown. It wasn't to the extent that I wanted to, alas, since I didn't want to disturb anyone, but I still had fun pretending (everyone I looked at smiled at me) and when I walked into Gottesman, I saw the happiest sight!

Here's what I love about that: Where else but YU could someone leave out brownies with instructions and actually be paid (as opposed to having people simply take the brownies and not leave any money?) I think it's a beautiful situation when we are able to do that.

So hurrah for the Jews and huzzah for today!


הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

I'm an avid supporter of the brownie idea myself myself. I think they got the idea from yeshivas in Israel. I don't know about the ones I haven't been to, but in my yeshivot the exact same system was in place (they usually cost 4 shekel).

The Cousin said...

Drop my sister an email about the dance classes. She's taken some classes before here in the City. You may want to check out the JCC, 92nd St Y or Alvin Ailey (those are just off the top of my head)

Did you really just get your MMR vaccine? Normally that's given to infants!

Shades of Gray said...

"I don't know about the ones I haven't been to, but in my yeshivot the exact same system was in place (they usually cost 4 shekel)."

You must have telepathy, as I was thinking of the same experience while reading about the brownies in YU.

I was visting Israel about five years ago, and spent a day in Ohr Somayach. One of the things I remember was cake wrapped up cellephane in the hallway, costing 5 NIS.(I remember standing outside a classroom waiting for it to become available for R. Wein's history lecture, and him making a joke about five Shekel cake--that's how I remember the price).

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

5 shekels is a ripoff!

Heshy said...


Anonymous said...

So did I see you @ Stern today before your makeover or after? You looked spectacular btw!

tnspr569 said...

The same honor system exists in Landers and in some parts of rural New England.

Shades of Grey said...

The brownies thing is even more hilarious if you know the guy who baked/is selling them, and he doesn't even go to YU anymore (not graduated, but transfered)

Echoing The Cousin - why did you get the MMR shot now? I had to get the mumps (second M of MMR) again before I volunteered at a hospital ER. They had done a blood check to make sure all my vaccines had properly worked (instead of just checking the paper record - such a smart idea!) and it turned out that my mumps vaccine, as well as my hepatitis B vaccine never innoculated me!!! So I had to get them again... they worked this time.

inkstainedhands said...

Sounds like you had a wonderful time! :]

We have the same thing in my school, by the way. There are cases of water bottles and sometimes food or little cheap presents in the student lounge and a water bottle standing next to it for you to leave the money in.

Anonymous said...

Actually, I can think of another place where the brownie thing could christian schools. In a lot of Jewish private high schools you get a lot of problems with cheating and stealing, etc. But, a friend of mine went to a Christian private school where they never had proctors for exams (they weren't needed) and ipods were left untouched on desks for weeks without anyone taking them.

nmf #7 said...

Sounds like you had a great day!

And 5 shekel is a ripoff! I have sold cake in Yeshivos here in Israel, and I charge 3 shekel for a nice big slice. (Think a large pan makes 12 slices.) Although, when my cake was sold in Or Somayach- they sold it for 5, because they bought it off me for 3, and then they make money on it also.
But Huzzah for Jews who are honest!

Anonymous said...

I come from Bais Yaakov in Boro Park and the store that everyone brought their snacks from allowed us to take things and leave the money on the counter until the owner got back.
I was always surprised but b"H I guess it doesn't occur to anyone else that it could be an undetectable theft.

harry-er than them all said...

many yeshivos have a similar system for different items.

My yeshiva in israel had someone selling singles (cigarettes) for a sekel each.

Shlomo said...

Interesting story along the same lines